Home > Anime, Article ideas, Rants, Senpai Magazine stuff > Possible Summer look at: Rio – Rainbow Gate!

Possible Summer look at: Rio – Rainbow Gate!

So I mentioned to my fellow writers, editors, and bossman that I’ll review Rio for the Summer issue. I’ve watched a few episodes and just had a sick feeling my stomach. The show itself is pretty light and fluffy… so I wasn’t sure why I was left feeling so upset. So I rewatched the first episode and it dawned on me, there’s absolutely NO brain nor heart in this anime.

 

 

Now if you know me, you know it is not my style to nitpick. If something was not meant to be over thought, I will not over think it. This is why I consider Street Fighter: The Movie (the REAL one, not that Chun-Li movie made a few years ago) to be one of the most fun films ever made, and why I can actually enjoy movies such as Alien Resurrection, Friday the 13th Part 4, Spiderman 3, Independence Day, and The Lost Boys sequels.

However, dumb anime is  dumb.. and as much as I try, I cannot give Rio: Rainbow Gate any mercy. First of all, in the first episode, by a conservative count, there are eight closeups of her ass, and about seven devoted to her chest. Look, I like women as much as the next guy, but I really don’t need to be reminded every two minutes that Rio has boobs. My memory isn’t great, but it isn’t nearly that bad.
Secondly, what casino on Earth would ever want a dealer that is so lucky, that customers are more likely to win when she’s in the room? That’s Rio’s claim to fame (and why she’s called the Goddess of Victory), that customers’ chances increase greatly when she’s around. I could see just how that would go in Vegas…

Boss: So Rio, do we have a problem?
Rio: No sir! Out of the thirty-seven gentlemen at my roulette table, thirty of them were big winners and won so much cash from our casino.

Boss:

Rio: Isn’t that great?! Now they have more than enough money to put all of their kids through college!

Boss: *ahem* Look, about those customers-

Rio: Right! As you say, “anything for the customer!” Well, sadly seven of them didn’t win at my table… but I tracked each of them down and gave them just enough luck to hit the jackpot on the slots! So everybody won!

Boss:

Rio: They don’t call me the Goddess of Victory for nothing! *giggle wink!* I plan on doubling the amount of winners tomorrow!

Boss: You’re fired.

Now I’ve only been to casinos in America (Foxwoods, Mohegan, Atlantic City and Vegas), but never in Japan. Perhaps in the land of the rising sun it’s different? I mean, in this anime poker looks less like a boring card game and more like an episode of Yugioh that was written by David Lynch.

I was just waiting for someone to say "Heart of the Cards"

 

This will be a fun review to say the least…

– Furry Senpai

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